Close the door….

 

 

It always amazes me in life how I seem to hear what I need to hear at exactly the right time or meet the person I need to meet exactly when I need to meet them.   

Even last week the day after I was talking about trusting the universe I found a t-shirt that said in light pink, my favorite color:  Trust the Universe.  Of course I bought it and continue to trust.  

This morning I was debating whether or not to go to yoga before sitting down to write.  A voice nudged me to go so I did.  In that yoga class my teacher said:

“Close the door to something that is no longer serving you.”

I felt a few tears in my eyes when she said this because I knew this message was for me and probably for many others in that room this morning.

All week I have been thinking about things and people in my life that are taking up too much of my energy.  All week I have been telling myself I need to let them go.  And then this morning my beliefs are validated through my yoga teacher: 

“Close the door to something that is no longer serving you.”

Thank you Universe.

For some people in my class this door might be a large, heavy one.  Some of them might be contemplating leaving a job, a spouse, ending a best friendship.  For others it might be something smaller, or as my yoga teacher said, “even trying a different yoga teacher or class if your current one isn’t working for you”.  

I am somewhere in the middle.  For me right now closing the door means saying no.  Saying no to things I don’t want to do.  No to people I don’t want to spend time with and saying an extra large NO to the voice in my head making me feel guilty when I do say no.

My husband tells me that sometimes I can be exclusive because I only want to be with our family versus other families.  This doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy being with other families, it just means that I really want to be with mine.  We are so spread thin that our time together is limited and I treasure it.  I don’t mean to be exclusive and it doesn’t mean I don’t like other families, I am just happiest when I am with mine.

Friends have told me I don’t text or call or facebook enough.  It doesn’t mean I don’t love them or care, I just don’t have the energy to talk and keep in touch with everyone when I can barely keep up with myself and my family.

I have been made fun of since college because sometimes I have to wear earplugs to shut out noise.  Quiet is very important to me.  If I don’t have quiet and stillness in my week I don’t do well.  Today I am surrounded by candles at my desk and am in complete silence.  I am so happy.  I am so at peace.

So today, I am promising myself:

1. To say no to things I don’t want to do

2. To say no to people I don’t want to see

3. To say no to noise on days when I need silence.

Just three doors.  I can do it.

The catch to this is that there are some things I have to do and some noise I have to hear. I have to go the the grocery store, cook dinner, drive kids to activities, etc., but these are “to do’s” that I have chosen.  I love being a mom and a wife and I will happily do the tasks required of me for these roles, but what I have to do, for me, is close the door on the other things that don’t let me perform those roles well.  I have to close the door on the other things that prevent me from being true to myself and true to those things and people most important to me.

So if I don’t go to coffee with someone or go to a party or an event or help at a school function, is not because I don’t like those people or those events,  it just means I love myself and my family more.  I need to do what is best for me to be the best Kristy Sands I can be and I know now that this sometimes that means shutting doors.

I feel very strongly that those I love will understand the doors I shut and those who don’t understand probably are those who aren’t a big part of my life anyway.  I  haven’t seen one of my very best friends who only lives twenty five minutes away from me in almost a year because both of us like quiet and family time.  Have we lost one ounce of love for eachother?  No.  None.  I feel those that matter will respect the doors I shut.   

And now, right now I feel very blessed that the things I need to let go of are manageable.  I send love out to those in my yoga class this morning who might have received a message to let go of something harder.   But hopefully all of us in that class whatever is is, no matter how big or how small will be able to,

“Close the door to something no longer serving you,

because I feel life is too short to hold on to something which does not.

I thank my yoga teacher Rose for validating what I need to do and I thank The Universe for leading me to Rose’s class this morning.   I hope you all are able to let go of what is not serving you and find peace and healing in doing so.  The light of this week’s full moon is a beautiful time for closing old doors and opening new ones. 

Blessings and Love,

Kristy Sands

 

 

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